What Next?

From the unbelievably useful to the unbelievably pointless, there are so many apps that have been developed, it’s hard to imagine being surprised anymore. It’s been 4 years since Apple first ran its “There’s an App for That” ad, and despite what they said about there being an app for just about anything, these apps are making us reconsider what “just about anything” means.

Crash Corsage

The Ridiculously Complicated: Crash Corsage

If you liked Wedding Crashers, then you’ll probably like this app. Crash Corsage is an app that helps you crash weddings. How, you ask? This is the ridiculous part. Taking advantage of the many couples who make their personal wedding sites using common templates, Crash Corsage searches the open directories of these sites to find all the information you would need to crash the big party. Location, time, and dress code not to mention background info on the happy couple and how they met — all available at your fingertips. This app even gamifies wedding crashing with functionality to support check-ins on Facebook and FourSquare and a points system for various tasks you can accomplish. Limbo, giving speeches, and even getting lucky. You need to provide photographic evidence, so that last one is a bit concerning. It’s not quite out yet but we’re on the waiting list to test it out see it when it does.

Sign Up for Early Access


The Unbelievably Useful: RunPee

RunPee is an app that tells you the best times to go for a bathroom run mid-movie. But actually it makes everything about your movie-going experience easier. Running late? No worries, they’ve got the first 3 minutes summarized for you. Not sure when to pee? RunPee will buzz to notify you when to sneak off the bathroom and read the synopsis of the part you’re missing while you’re doing the deed. Not feeling like going right about then? No problem, just check the timeline of the movie to see how far off the next “peetime” is. Beyond its main functionality, it also lets you know if there are extra scenes after the credits worth waiting for and allows you to connect with IMDB and Rotten Tomatoes to find more information. It does cost $0.99 in both the iTunes and Google Play stores, but if you love going to movies and have tiny bladder syndrome, this is the app for you.

Find it on iTunes | Find it on Google Play

My Opener

The Utterly Useless: MyOpener

“Experience the joy of opening a cold refreshing beverage without the inconvenience of actually consuming it!” Whoever penned these words was obviously delusional. What’s more shocking about this app that allows you to simulate opening a beer bottle, beyond the fact that it was ever developed, is that it costs $0.99 in the iTunes store. If you really feel the need to avoid the inconvenience of consuming cold beverages but can’t stop yourselves from opening them, we urge you to consider becoming a bartender.

Please Don’t Buy This from iTunes

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